Zombie Apocalypse? What do I wear?

So it’s the Zombie Apocalypse you’ve been dreaming of all your life, but what are you going to wear? Here is a guide to what I think is the best, yet stylish outfit for you to wear day in day out for probably the last few days, weeks if you’re lucky or months if you have a really really good plan, of your life.

The Jacket is a must!

I have enjoyed Walking Dead but man they do some dumbass shit that gets them killed. The one huge mistake they are making bugs the crap out of me.   Amy didn’t need to die her death could have been avoided if any of them had actually stopped and thought – zombies like to bite.  She got bitten on the arm! A fate that would not have come to be if she had been wearing a jacket. 

What kinda moron doesn't cover their arms?

Why on earth are people walking round in a zombie apocalypse with bare arms?? I get that they may get hot but I’d rather be sweaty then a rotting, decaying smelling undead corpse. So my personal number one rule is COVER YOUR SKIN. Plate armour is simply ridiculous, in an undead apocalypse manoeuvrability is an essential and as any roleplayer knows leather offers an armour plus and no human alive of undead can easily bite through leather without a sustained period of gnawing and if you get yourself into a situation where sustained gnawing is possibility, you’re pretty much screwed anyway.  Why leather of thick padded?  Leather is wipe clean, always a bonus.

The Top

White t-shirt would be my option for under the jacket. You don’t want anything to insulating like a jumper or long sleeves, the amount of running you’re going to have to do mean you will quickly increase your body temp and fainting from heat exhaustion mid flee is not an option. Obviously if you’re in Alaska or the Outer Hebrides a jumper may be appropriate, I do ask that you use a little of your own common sense. The colour is important, white or other light colours are essential, yes the stain easily but that’s the point, when bashing zombie brains it’s good to know where zombie brain splatter has landed. Dark colours my mask potentially infectious matter putting you and may be others around you at risk. 

All leather? you won't look like this.

The Bottoms

It should go without saying, I hope, that skirts of any kind are a no no. Keep them legs covered! My choice here is hard instinct says leather trousers, but then it’s easy to look like a dick in head to toe leather, plus getting them on and off when you’re drenched in the sweat of your adrenalin fuelled escape is really hard and baby powder is not something I would expect anyone to have as standard in their zombie survival pack. So my choice is good old fashioned jeans, not jeggings, but hard wearing comfy yet stylish jeans or another option is cargo pants, but good proper military style pants with those extra handy pockets.

Footwear

Absolutely NO HEELS! Whilst I appreciate how handy they may be for stabbing a zombie straight through the eye,  the potential for having to break into a sprint at a moment’s notice outweighs a heeled shoes usefulness as a weapon.  I’m also saying no the any form of canvas shoe, sandal, Crocs. My choice is a big sturdy boot, preferably with a steel toe cap ideal for brain destroying head stomping and mostly waterproof and hard wearing. 

Accessories

Scarf – offers some neck protection plus mouth covering options to avoid splatter. Also allows you to brighten your outfit a little, have a range of colour options for the change of seasons.

Leather gloves - again skin protection though ensure gloves have a good grip, you don’t want your axe flying from your beautifully shiny leather clad hands at the worst possible moment.

Belt – Keeps your jeans up and items can be tied to it for that extra storage D&D style.  Also gives you the option of a badass belt buckle to finish off your awesome zombie fighter look. 

Ladies be sure to pick up a good sports bra there’s a lot of running involved in surviving zombies, though why these people never get themselves a bike is beyond my comprehension. Also tie your hair back, better still opt for a shorter look, it’ll be all the rage in a world with limited shampoo and conditioning supplies.

One of the best things about all of these items is they are easy to source. Many people already have many of these things and those who don’t can make a quick, no doubt, action packed but ill-fated raid of your local shopping centre. Just be sure to take some friends as bait, if zombie movies have taught us nothing else we know that ‘supply’ runs will always result in at least one member of the party being munched on. 

So there it i,s my recommended outfit for the zombie apocalypse, practical yet badass and hopefully if you're doing it right you'll end up looking like this awesome dude but without those very useful adamantium claws.

Wonder woman looking classier then ever

This artwork by FlashDaz won first place in the Superhero Modren contest on 1000worth.com. I would love are large print hanging in my fantasy library of my fantasy house mansion.

Avengers 2012 film makes me wee a little...

because I am so excited! these latest banners just fuel it. Yep I am going to declare this is the most excited I have ever been about a film, fingers crossed they don't let me down, though if Ironman, Thor and Captain America are anything to go by I won't be disappointed.

My ultimate Christmas geek themed wish list...

So it’s the time of year where people are asking me what I want for Christmas. This is a really hard question, there are many things I want none of which I ever feel comfortable asking for. May be it’s because I am too polite, maybe it’s because without some kind of price guides I feel cheeky no matter what the cost may be. This year, too make things a little easier, I decided to create an Amazon wish list and found myself filling it with graphic novels. Not that this is a bad thing, they are reasonably priced and I would never tire of receiving them, but my lovely husband said I should be a bit more adventurous.  So I started browsing and OMG there is so much stuff I want, unfortunately it mostly falls into the ‘need to be some kind of millionaire to justify paying that’ category.  

So instead of moping around angry at the world because despite us both working full time I can’t afford the things I want, I thought I'd disperse my frustration by sharing my hearts desire with you guys. That way should a kind hearted generous millionaire wish to surprise me with my ideal gift they know exactly what I want.

Just to clarify these pick are related to the theme of geek, that’s what would make me happiest , though a new house with say, 4 bedrooms, indoor pool, home theatre and custom built gaming room wouldn’t go amiss.

So lets kick off with a simple and most know fact about me - I love Wonder Woman since being a small child spinning around to the full grown adult comic collector I am today.  So here are just a couple of my picks for a Wonder Woman fan.

The DC Online Wonder Woman Statue

This particular statue I favour because I believe it to be one of the most beautiful renderings I have seen. At a cool £99.85 from Amazon it is certainly out of my reach whilst my children are young. Unfortunately clothing and feeding children is a statutory requirement so most of my funds are focused there. This piece would, indeed, have pride of place on my mantelpiece and I’m pretty sure seeing it everyday would instill me with a sense of confidence only an amazon can invoke.

  

Ed Benes Original Comics Art - Wonder Woman

This piece of original comic art by Ed Benes is a dream purchase for a fan like me available for £599.99 from Reedcomics.com. Though its origin isn't clear, the website suggests it may be from a Justice League collectible card, I would still snap it up in an instant and hang it proudly in my (as yet non-existent) comic art gallery. Here is a link should any of you wish to steal it away from. Not that I can ever picture having that kind of money, but I'll keep buying the lottery tickets cos you never know.

Marvel Minimates - First Appearance X-Men 4 Pack

Okay so this one may not be completely out of my reach (£16.99) and I am sure one generous relative may one day buy this, but I've just come across them and realised I can't actually get them in the UK without paying an extortionate delivery charge. Which is something that annoys me why can't we get the same merchandise as is available in the USA. I pay my money for my comics, I go to the pictures to watch my heroes on the silver screen, so why can't have have the same merchandise to waste my hard earned pennies on!

Anyway, breath, classic X-Men what's not to love? good ol' Jean, Beast before he turned blue, Cyclops before he turned into a huge douche (once again, still a little bitter 'bout the whole Emma Frost affair) and Iceman before...well Iceman. 

 Next up Tenth Doctor Coat. 

There are not many people I know who are not aware of my deep and ever lasting love for the 10th Doctor, David Tennant did it for me so perfectly. Whilst I am still a massive fan I find it hard to believe that I will ever enjoy a regeneration of the Doctor as much I did 10. This would also look awesome along side the life size cutout my lovely hubby got for me. 

£203ish is a lot for a coat that I am pretty sure would look ridiculous on me due to my short stature. Still there would be nothing to stop me running around the house sonicing everything as I go. All I would want next is a Rose Tyler jacket and me the the other half can roleplay to our hearts content. Just to point out I would be wearing the Rose Tyler jacket and him the Doctors, we don't gender reverse roleplay or anything.

And now for a piece of classic geek memorbilia.

Spock's badass tunes  or, more accurately, Star Trek Original Series Vulcan Lute Prop Replica. At a whooping $2,009.99 its some serious collectors item and most definately a talking point. Just imagine some hipster dude you are ashamed to  know, stops by and whips out his acoustic guitar and starts jamming, you confidently produce your alien lute and blow his hipster mind. Of course you would have to learn to play it first, but it would be so worth it. Plus how hard can it be? 

  A few options from Firebox, who, I have recently discovered, have a large range of expensive geek related items in their WTF?! department. 

1. Replica Dalek - £3,496 Again a classic piece of sci fi history first appearing in 1963 and something my son is terrified of so this would come in very handy during the months of the year that the threat of Father Christmas watching doesn't work.

  

2. Fuck yeah a Batmobile! - £120,000 is probably a steal considering the amount Batman must have paid to build his. Granted this probably doesn't come with any of the awesome offensive and defensive tech Batmans has, but there is nothing to stop you having ago at fitting a drawing pin trap on the back or may be a makeshift ejector seat. Please note: I do not accept any liability should some unqualified dumbass try and do this and get themselves maimed or killed. 

 3. Freaking awesome Bat Mirror to match your batmobile. I think this is a classy piece. Not obvious or in your face, wouldn't look out of place above your mantle piece yet sends a message to your visitors about you. Mainly you're a mega geek who would spend £399.99 on mirror with the Batman logo. 

Evil cat not included

There are many many more items on Firebox which I believe are the ultimate geek must haves, including Class M-3 Model B9 General Utility Non-Theorizing Environmental Control Robot  of Lost in Space fame. Not sure where one would keep it but I guess if you can afford to buy it at £25,500 you can afford to buy the mansion required to store all this stuff. Also what lair would be complete without one of these babies, a good old fashioned Bond style Villains Chair for £4,500. You'd have to get your own white pussycat and sharks with fricking laserbeams and don't ask Seaworld, they don't approve.

At the last minute I found this and couldn't let it go without a mention 'cos you know he wouldn't.  A must have for any comic lover to have as pride of place on their desk. The Deadpool 6 Inch Pencil Cup Desk Accessory currently priced at £97.99 from Forbidden Planet. I believe the anti-hero himself would approve of this handy yet cool pencil holder.

So there it is my first few picks of stuff I can't afford but desperately want. I guess not all the options will be completely out of my reach forever, one day the kids will grow (fingers crossed) leave to start their own geekdom (fingers crossed), may be then just may be I might get my hands on a Batmobile. Up until that point lottery tickets it is, it's good to have a dream and many of these items fufill those dreams, you may call me materialistic but if I'm happy with love, family and friends what else do I dream of? Things! lots and lots of things!

Avengers vs X-Men...so very excited

Yep this announcement made me squeal a little. Nothing I like more than hero on hero action. I thoroughly enjoyed Civil War and am hoping for more of the same. However I approach with caution and I'll tell you why. I have recently invested my hard earned pennies in two of the Marvel events.

Not entirely satisfying?

I bought Fear Itself, an event that involved a lot of the Avengers and opted to stick with just the 7 issue main title, not the all the tie-in titles and not because I didn't want to but because my husband didn't want to have to remortgage the house. Past big events like this I had only read in graphic novel form, but as my comic collecting has stepped up a gear I decided to allow myself the pleasure of eagerly waiting for the next issue to drop through my letterbox. The downside of this was a gutting feeling that I missed an awful lot of the story by not buying, lets say, Ironman's point of view.  This was disheartening, yeah what I read was good, don't ever think I have ever truly hated a comic, but I just knew more awesome feats and battles were happening elsewhere. It niggled at me all the way through and when it reached its conclusion I felt as though I had merely read a wiki entry synopsis for the event. Yes I can go to the wiki and read all about what happened to everyone else, but the question is should I have to?

On the other hand X-Men:Schism I thoroughly enjoyed. It reminded me of a similar scenario my rpg group and I played in our superhero universe and so I was instantly enthralled and excited by it. My assumption from the brief I read, was that I would side with Cyclops. Of the two I am a bigger fan of  Scott, why? purely girl reasons I'm afraid, great love stories, betrayal and angst. Wolverine as great as he is seems to be a very male orientated character. Now don't think for one minute I don't like Wolverine, that would be sacrilege, I have read many stories with him and enjoyed them, I'm just saying if I had to pick it would be Cyclops.

Nothing like a little action within the team

However I was wrong in terms of Schism. I actually shocked myself and definitely sided with Wolverine. It won my approval  and I felt the story delivered was satisfying and complete. I was happy that I knew everything to make my choice without feeling the need to rush out in my slippers and buy the Schism:Generation Hope. This, I believe, is a compliment to the writers. I often feel that Marvel take advantage of the fans and try to produce as many titles tied to one event as possible, spread across the entire universe. This is unfair to the average earner like me who has to put feeding and clothing children ahead of my intense desire submerge myself in every comic I can get my get my hands on. So this takes me back to Avengers vs X-Men

May be I am just a bigger fan of X-Men then any of the others. But, to be honest, I have now read many comics and have found I am capable of enjoying many of the superheroes both Marvel, DC and others have to offer. My point is Avengers vs X-Men will hopefully involve some of the biggest heroes from each team and so the stakes are higher and I am expecting a lot.

What do I want? well I'll tell you, I want a full and completely gripping story. I want to be told personal tales where a readers loyalty is tested and torn right until the end and I don't want to have to buy 30 comics just to get a satisfying story. 

Please, please, please let it be as good as this picture suggests.

Either way I will be adding it to my pull list just as soon as they let me. It would be foolish for me not to. However, I do so with fingers crossed and a simple wish that Marvel will make me happy.